Thursday, January 17, 2013

Bad Mom Points = 3; Good Mom Points = 1.

Dang, I lost to the bad - 3 to 1.  Let's review, shall we.

Bad Points:
Miles - I went to pick up Miles from Cub Scouts at our church.  The boys finished up playing their game and then apparently went in to the gym (he somehow sneaked right past me!) where other groups (Scouts, YM, etc.) were hanging out.   I saw Miles clear at the other end of the gym playing with a couple other kids.  Another older group was shooting some hoops.  The basketball came over to Miles and Miles picked it up.  And what did he do?  Threw it back to the kid, right?  Right?  Wrong.  He threw it completely away from the kids that were playing with it.  In some way that is just so typical of Miles.  It disgusts me.  Seriously.  I.  Was.  Mad.  In some ways, it's a little thing and I get that.  But with Miles, it's just not.  So when he got in the car, I did not ask him right away, "So how was Cub Scouts?"  Instead I lectured him, told him how disappointed I was (I probably used the word "disgusted," too), etc.  A few minutes later I finally asked him about his evening.

Emmy - Emmy came crying to me about hitting her head.  She told me she was playing on Lucy's bed.  As in the top part.  As in the tiny sheet over Lucy's bed.  As in I've told her many times that we don't play on Lucy's bed like that.  So I had no sympathy for her.  In fact I even told her, "When you do dumb things, I just don't feel too badly about."  I did not console her.  Instead I told her to go up and fix Lucy's bed.  Which she tried.  But she couldn't.  And she had stopped crying by then.

Lucy - Lucy, Lucy, Lucy.  Jonas was going out on the ice rink and Lucy said she wanted to, too.  So I told her as soon as I finished up the dishes, I would help her get ready.  She bothered me a few more times and I reminded her a few more times that when I was finished, I would help. (!)  Then she took matters in to her own hands and tried putting on her skates.  She dropped one on her foot.  I coldly told her, "I'm sorry, but you should have waited for me to help you."  After the dishes and a forever number of minutes in getting her dressed, finding this sock, that glove, her helmet, getting me ready, too, etc., we finally made it out to the rink.  In less than 30 seconds of being out on the ice, she told me she wanted to go back inside.  NOPE.  I told her she was out there for a while longer.  So she just pretty much stayed on the wall (I had gotten her a stroller to push around, but she didn't want to . . .).  Which leads me to my good mom point . . .

Jonas - I played with Jonas on the ice rink.  We played a little one-on-one and had fun.  Jonas is getting better.  After playing one-on-one we then started to play tag.  It was pretty fun.  Then I stuck Lucy in the stroller and pushed her around with me.  Everyone loved that.  Lucy would even reach out to try and tag Jonas.  It was pretty cool.  And kind of difficult for me - a not-so-very-good ice skater.  When Jonas was supposed to tag me and then it would be time to go in - he purposely (but trying to be sly about it . . .) would not tag me.  It was really a fun time.

We win some and lose some.


Montrose Lewises said...

It's so hard to put away cranky judgy mom and always be perfectly loving and sweet... Then I think how would they learn if I was ALWAYS sweet... Ugh it's such a hard balance :D I get that way with Adaiah that you did with Miles. I expect a lot of her and can feel super disappointed when she doesn't rise to the occasion! But remember to count your drops of awesomeness ;)

erinmalia said...

of course i get this. so freaking hard to be patient and loving and understanding at all times when you're dealing with children! argh. kids. if they didn't act so immature, it would be easy. :)

Niederfam said...

You are SOOOOO not alone. I think the same thing every night........I tuck my kids in and tell them I LOVE them and HOPE that's what they remember about the day. NOT me "scolding" them about something that went wrong during the day. ;)

You are an AMAZING mother. AMAZING. Trust me.

courtney said...

the moral of this post is that you had a good mom point! that is what matters. (and i agree that it is hard to be sympathetic when they get hurt doing something you asked them not to do!)